Parents @ Cypress

When it comes to influencing children and students there's no question who has the greatest opportunity. Hands down, every time, its the family.

On average, a church has about 40 hours in one year to influence a life.

Families on the other hand have about 3,000 hours to influence that same person.

Based on this finding Reggie Joiner and the ReThink group are doing some great work in transforming the way that church and family partner to make the biggest impact on the next generation.

Here are some of their thoughts from the book "Think Orange" from chapter two: The Family...

Most parents can't give their children a lavish inheritance, but every parent will leave a personal legacy.

However, with the excess that surrounds most Americans, a lot of families get sidetracked from what really matters. We become so preoccupied with giving kids an inheritance that we forget the significance of leaving a legacy.

Even though most parents genuinely believe their jobs aren't to make their children happy, they often get worn down and give in. In my pursuit of what I thought would make my kids happy, I threatened what makes them come alive.

(When this happens) families run the risk of becoming relationally poor in their pursuit of becoming experimentally rich.

We need to stay focused on what's important, what will last so I sat down and made a list of the things I wanted to remember so I could stay focused.

• What matters more than anything is that my kids have an authentic relationship with God.

• All my children need to know I will never stop pursuing them or fighting for a right relationship with them.


• My personal relationship with God and with my wife affects them more than I realize.


• Just being together can never substitute for interacting together in a healthy way.


• A mother and father are not the only adult influences my children need.

After I wrote these phrases and reread them, I realized a common thread ties them together: They are connected by the value of relationships. They are matters of the heart.

The family's role is to love and demonstrate God's character through an unconditional relationship.

But there's something that bothers me...A lot of Christian parenting books I have read start with the premise that there is an ideal mom or dad. These superparents conduct morning devotions, pray together every night, play contemporary Christian music, put framed verses on their walls, stay neatly within their biblical roles as husband and wife, vote conservatively, and attend church every week, where they give ten percent of their income.

I am not dismissing religious parents...but I just can't find any paragons of parenting in Scripture...

My point is this: Parenting is hard. Families are messy. There are no clear biblical examples. Anyone who claims they have discovered the secret to effective parenting is probably covering something up, just had a baby, or recently graduated from Bible college with a degree in youth ministry.

The New Testament suggests that every husband, wife, and child has a unique role in portraying God's love to each other. The family exists, even in its imperfection, to display the heart of God to every generation.

Check back tomorrow for the top 5 family values we must keep in focus as we influence the next generation together.