Dating Violence

Last night we spent our time beginning a discussion about dating violence and abuse because of the recent new coverage of the prince and princess of Hip Hop and R & B Rihanna and Chris Brown. According to a recent affidavit just before the Grammy Awards the two were having a fight over a text message that Chris Brown received from another woman. The fight escalated and Chris Brown allegedly threw her into the car door, hit her, and choked her while verbally threatening her life.

During our conversation about this very serious issue we learned that a surprising amount of students believe that Chris Brown deserved the benefit of the doubt because of his looks and star status, that Rihanna deserved what she got because if she hadn't provoked him none of this would have happened, and that some of our teens view a woman caught in the cycle of abuse as an "idiot".

The bottom line is this: abuse is NEVER okay. Verbal, emotional, or physical abuse is NEVER okay. Whether you're a guy, girl, junior higher, senior higher or off at college abuse is NEVER okay or deserved! Never, never, never!

God's word is very clear that we are worth more than that and our value and shouldn't come from another human being but it should be found in the loving arms of our Creator - God.

Parents: if you haven't discussed the issue of dating violence with your student, do it now! If you don't begin that conversation they are left to deal with it alone. Just check out the stats below found at www.thesafespace.org ...

• One in three teens experience some kind of abuse in their romantic relationships, including verbal and emotional abuse.
• One in five of teenagers report having been hit, slapped or pushed.
• 40% of teenage girls, ages 14 to 17, know someone their age who has been hit or beaten by their partner.
• Nearly 80% of girls who have been physically abused in their intimate relationships continue to date their abuser.
• 1 in 4 teenage girls who have been in relationships reveal they have been pressured to perform oral sex or engage in intercourse.

And did you know that...

• Dating violence can happen guys? Guys don’t report it as often because they feel like its too embarrassing to admit they’re being emotionally or physically abused by a female.
• A lot of people believe that if you don’t see bruises or blood then its not abuse. This is 100% false. Emotional abuse and light physical abuse is still abuse and does just as much damage to someone’s spirit and self-esteem.
• Abuse happens in cycles. Chances are if someone lashes out in abusive ways they will do it again, and again, and again!

Students: if you're still not sure if you're in an abusive relationship take the healthy relationship quiz here or if you are scared or in danger right now call 911. Don't wait to get help!